You’ve just moved to a new city, your circle of friends has shrunk, or you simply want to meet people outside work. And you’re not the only one: plenty of people would love to go out with some new faces, but few dare to send the invitation. Hosting a party to meet new people, whether it’s a girls’ night, an evening among strangers or a get-together for friends of friends, is easier than it looks, as long as you take care of three things: the format, the welcome and how sign-ups work.
1. Pick a Format That Gets People Talking
An evening among strangers rarely fails for lack of people; it fails when everyone sticks with the one person they already knew. The format should give people a reason to talk:
- Drinks in a small group (8 to 15 people): enough for varied conversations, few enough that nobody gets lost.
- Dinner around one big table: ideal for longer conversations, but ask people to switch seats for dessert.
- An activity: a workshop, a quiz, board games, a walk, a cooking class. The activity fills the first few minutes, the ones where nobody knows what to say.
- A themed evening: a question everyone answers, a book or film they love, a recipe to bring.
For a first edition, keep it simple: one place, one time, a small number of spots.
2. Choose a Neutral, Reassuring Venue
When the guests don’t know each other, the venue matters twice as much:
- A public place (a bar with a reserved table, a private room, a café, a park in summer) rather than someone’s home for a first time. It’s more reassuring for everyone, starting with you.
- A place where you can hear each other: avoid loud music and packed Friday-night bars.
- Easy to reach by public transport, and close to a well-lit stop if the evening ends late.
If you’re hosting at home, share the exact address only with people whose sign-up you’ve accepted, and give just the neighbourhood in the announcement.
3. Decide Who Can Sign Up
This is the central question for an open evening. Three approaches, depending on who you’re inviting:
- Open to all, limited spots: first come, first served. Simple, but you don’t know who’ll turn up.
- Approval-based: each person sends a request, and you accept or decline. Essential for a women-only evening, one for a specific age range or group, or simply to keep a balance.
- By referral: each guest can bring one person they know. The circle grows naturally, with a baseline of trust.
For an approval-based evening, add a short question to the request form that checks your criterion (“Are you between 25 and 40?”). It helps you decide, and shows guests the evening is well run. If you’re unsure, a quick exchange of messages with the person does the rest. We cover this method in detail in our guide to approval-based events.
4. Announce the Evening Where the People You’re Looking For Are
An evening for meeting people won’t fill up within your usual circle. A few channels that work:
- neighbourhood mutual-aid groups or newcomers’ groups in your city;
- associations, sports clubs and workshops you already go to;
- your social media, asking your friends to share with their own friends;
- a QR code put up (with permission) in a local café or bookshop.
In the announcement, be specific about who it’s for, how the evening will go and any cost: “Women’s evening, ages 25 to 40, new to Paris or not, drinks then a quiz, 12 spots, everyone pays for their own drinks.” A clear announcement draws the right people and puts off the rest.
5. Take Care of the Welcome: That’s Where It All Happens
The first ten minutes set the mood. A few simple things:
- Greet each person as they arrive and introduce them to someone.
- Offer name tags: nobody remembers twelve first names at once.
- Start a quick round of introductions, or a fun question, once everyone has arrived.
- Mix up the groups: a change of table, a second activity, dessert somewhere else.
For a girls’ night or an evening among strangers, a ground rule stated at the start (no judgement, newcomers are welcome) puts everyone at ease.
6. Keep the Connection Going After the Evening
If people enjoyed themselves, they’ll want to meet again. Suggest the next date the very next day, share a few photos (with everyone’s consent) and, if you host regularly, keep a list of interested people so you can let them know about the next edition.
With Torool: The Announcement, the Requests, a Protected Address
Torool doesn’t find guests for you, but it makes everything else simpler.
- One link to share. Type a title like “Girls’ night drinks to meet new people”: Torool suggests the right format. Share the public link in your groups or on social media, or print the QR code. Everyone replies from their browser, with their first name, with no app or account.
- Approval when you need it. Turn on “Approve each reply”: each person sends a request, which you accept by switching their status to “Coming”. If they left their email, they receive “Your spot is confirmed”. You can add a yes/no question to check your criterion.
- Limited spots. Set the number of spots; once it’s reached, the link shows “It’s full”.
- A protected address. With a “Public name” (“The local bar, Paris”), the exact address and “Your contact for the day” are shown only to people who replied “I’m coming”.
- Who’s coming. After replying, guests see who’s coming by first name (“With Léa, Sam and 3 others”), so they arrive already knowing a few names.
- The reminder. People who left their email can ask for a reminder the day before, with the address.
All of this is free, with no limit on events or guests. If you host often, a Torool community (the Communities & Organizations plan, €19.90/month with 30 days free) lets guests follow you, and you can let them know when you announce a new date.
Frequently Asked Questions
How many people should I invite to a first evening?
Between 8 and 15. Fewer, and one absence is noticeable; more, and people struggle to get to know each other. Accept a few more requests than you have spots: some people who sign up won’t come.
How do I stop people from coming without signing up?
Don’t publish the exact address: only accepted guests receive it. At the door, a list of first names is usually enough.
Should guests pay?
It isn’t necessary. The simplest option: everyone pays for their own drinks on the spot. If you’re covering costs (a room, an activity), state the amount in the invitation.
Key Takeaways
A small group, a public place where you can hear each other, approval-based sign-up when the audience needs to be specific, an address shared only with accepted guests and a thoughtful welcome: that’s the foundation of an evening where people really do meet someone new. To go further, see our guide to organizing an event with friends.